Mariners Pour on offense, win 10-0

I am a craft beer lady, through and through. Give me basically anything but an IPA, DIPA or TIPA with a silly name and I’m hooked. Luckily, I live in the smallest state in the country, and the craft beer community is as tight-knit as it gets – not to mention that getting to one of your favorites doesn’t require a lot of time (although Rhode Islanders sure will say more than 20 minutes requires a packed lunch).

Although I’m not that far from any of them, I still prefer one in particular just around the corner from my house – Nickname Brewery.

Moniker has practically become my second home. It’s the first place I take people when they come to visit and they all have a fuzzy distance (Hefeweizen) freshly poured for me every time I walk through the front door.

Last weekend a new customer decided to visit the brewery, probably to try a flight.

That’s right the boss was a bird and at this point I’m fully convinced that they got lost on the way back from Boston and that’s actually the whole thing Baltimore Orioles crew.

From George Kirby’s dirty sliders to Seattle’s offense’s ability to find every gap in the infield, the Mariners made Baltimore look downright lost at sea tonight.

For George Kirby, tonight started to look a bit like his previous two starts where he gave up 16 hits and 9 earned runs against Oakland and Boston. Luckily for him, and Elon’s happy group of friends and family we’ve come to love, it didn’t stay that way.

Although Baltimore holds the 27th-lowest walk rate in the league at 7.5%, Kirby gave up a walk with just four batters in his inning. That walk turned out to be his only one of the night and was immediately followed by a much better result – an end-inning strikeout (which is totally better).

From there, Kirby focused on setting up the right pitch combination to get seven more batters to hit. You know what goes really well with a crunchy homemade infusion? Cursors.

By my calculations and also the help that my glasses give me so that I can actually, you know, see, Kirby threw his cursor about a quarter of its way out.

It’s a much tastier picture. Those four little red dots in the lower right corner are all sliders, representing 4 of the 8 pitches that hit some Orioles (sorry, PETA). Here’s an example that made Cedric Mullins a little giddy.

Kirby ended his night with a respectable 6.0 IP, 4 H, 0 ER, 0 R, 8 Ks. Atta Georgey.

We all know that a brewery that consistently produces one really, really good pilsner or IPA (lol, not for me) or stout, but for some reason nothing else can approach the caliber of their best beer. Their best beer carries them as far as it can go, but in the end it doesn’t have the backing of anything else down the line to really make the brewery a success.

Sound familiar?

Sailor fans should by now know the silly little trope that accompanies every good pitching performance from a member of our starting core.

If only the offense could provide any support.

We would have had it if we could even score two points.

Just because our SP threw a shutout doesn’t mean we have to let the other SP have one too.

Tommy Gilligan – USA TODAY Sports

Luckily, Luckily, it wasn’t that game. I don’t know what went into the team, but anyone reading this who knows what it’s like to have a good sports bra knows that for some reason the Mariners have splurged and are went with a attractive.

In summary, the Mariners:

• Had 10 carries on 13 hits
• Hit 3 doubles before the Orioles recorded their 5th of the day
• Taylor Trammell had FOUR RBIs
• All but one starter had at least one hit (sorry, JP)
• Batters 5-9 accounted for 9 of 10 points on the night

And they did it all without a single home run. Just a good little ball.

Tommy Gilligan – USA TODAY Sports

Whether he eats, sleeps, breathes, smiles, laughs or has fun, the world is watching Julio. The 21-year-old’s fluorescent light bulb that shone in the clubhouse as he entered is an eye-catcher wherever he goes, so it’s only fitting that he had three of the game’s most exciting moments today.

#1 Stolen (who is Rob?)

Did this move mark the first run of the match? Yes. But was it a home run? Ask any ballpark that isn’t Camden Yards and the answer would be yes. But Julio lost his chance at the Olympics when he tried to head for the brand new billion feet of outfield on this pitch.

#2 I got it

Need I say more?

#3 Colored outside the lines

As Megan Corcoran so elegantly put it on Twitter“baby’s first ejection!”

With the first game in the series in the books, the Mariners can confidently say they jumped out of the plane at BWI with a dream and a cardigan an appetite to win. Tonight was fun, but hopefully their opponent doesn’t get so lost on their way to the ballpark before the next game.